Lent Rant: ...Saturday

Part 1: Mardi Gras
Part 2: Ash Wednesday
Part 3: Giving Shit Up
Part 4: No Meat
Part 5: Palm Sunday
Part 6: Holy Thursday
Part 7: Good Friday


...Saturday

Following Good Friday which, itself is after Holy Thursday, is the day before Easter Sunday, known as... Saturday. I don't know why it doesn't get a name. I've heard some people try putting "good" or "holy" before it, but I don't think any of that's official.

I suppose it's for the best because the day could only be described as awkward. All this stuff before and after but no rollover into Saturday. I tell you, it's like for one day a year, Catholics get a taste of the Jewish Sabbath, not being able to do anything all day. I spend the entire day feeling bad if I do anything. "I should go get something to eat. Oh wait. I really shouldn't. The Lord is dead." It puts a damper on everything, which would be fine on a Monday or something, but it's such a waste for a Saturday.

For some sad souls, it doesn't matter. They are losing their Saturday night anyway by going to Easter Vigil: a mass so long that you could actually read the bible front to back with time to spare. I know this because I went once*. It started on "The First day" and got all the way to "he rises again" and I didn't see them skip a page. I'm not going to say is was boring, but it helped me understand why Catholics are driven to drinking.

* And only once!!!

The one plus side <Loophole Alert!> is that Easter comes early after that. People are free to end Lent then and there (not worth it). I'm sure this isn't official Church doctrine, but more a decision by the masses. **

** You may ask, why is there an Easter mass on Saturday? Quit asking questions. Especially stupid ones that you know there's not an answer to. I thought I warned you against doing that.