Movie Reaction: Hotel Artemis

Formula: Free Fire / Smokin' Aces

It's a not too distant future. The city of Los Angeles is rioting because of water shortages. The rioters are going after the private water company that manages the supply for the city. You could call this a neo-futurist Chinatown if you'd like. I wouldn't, but you are free to do what you want. In an increasingly lawless world, criminal syndicates have become more powerful and common. The problem is, those involved in that underworld can't be taken to a hospital when they are hurt, because that's how the police can get them. The solution: open secret hospitals in major cities. In place of insurance, the hospitals sell memberships and only members are allowed in. Add a few rules like "no cops allowed in ever" and cap the number of patients allowed at any time. Put a medical professional with a lapsed license in charge and you have the setup for Hotel Artemis.

When I think about it now, there's an impressive amount of exposition in Hotel Artemis that is woven in without feeling like an information dump. Because there's even more to it than that first paragraph. There are rules about assassins. All sorts of new technology is introduced. There's a history to the Hotel Artemis: the location of the secret hospital where almost the entire movie takes place. Then there's the characters. Jodie Foster plays "The Nurse" who runs the place. She's agoraphobic and has a tragic past of some sort. Everest (Dave Bautista) is the only other employee at the hospital. He's an all-purpose grunt. The patients (all code names) include two brothers, Honolulu (Brian Tyree Henry) and Waikiki (Sterling K. Brown), who need to be patched up after a botched bank robbery, a woman, Nice (Sofia Boutella), looking for some peace and quiet, an arms dealer, Acapulco (Charlie Day), who needs to be patched up after an encounter with a mistress went sour, and eventually Niagara (Jeff Goldblum), the crime boss of Los Angeles. Also on the periphery is Crosby Franklin (Zachary Quinto), Niagara's overzealous youngest son and Morgan (Jenny Slate), an injured cop who seems to know who the Nurse is. Juggling and digesting all this information isn't that difficult when watching the movie. It just sounds like a lot recounting it now.

The fun of the movie is seeing how all the stories are intertwined. The film takes place over one night and rarely leaves the hotel. It's pretty much the worst case scenario for the Hotel Artemis. Everything that can go wrong does. I'm a big fan of this kind of movie (I'm calling them "wind up movies" for now until I find out the actual name). The film introduces a bunch of characters, establishes some interpersonal connections, puts them in a confined space, and and watches to see how things unfold. It's a kind of movie I like because it almost demands that the characters drive the action rather than the plot after a certain point. In the case of Hotel Artemis, I wasn't a huge fan of how it's done. The worst-case scenario was almost too perfect, and the ease with which some of them came up left me wondering how this hospital was able to function for the last two decades. Surely some of these problems had to happen before this. It's something that bothered me more in hindsight than when it was happening though. Maybe I'm being nitpicky.

Really, I saw this for the cast. Jodie Foster hasn't been in much lately. This was her first movie in 5 years. She grounds the movie. This is a movie filled with big characters. She's a colorful character too, but she is the one who feels most real (except for Slate, who is meant to be an outsider). Dave Bautista is enjoyable. He has fun with the contrast between his imposing physique and goofball demeanor. He's a toned-down Drax in this. Charlie Day is delighted with playing a scumbag. Zachary Quinto plays his role with a lot of verve. Whenever Sterling K. Brown shows up, he feels like he's the lead in the movie, but he is a supporting character at the end of the day. I get the feeling that the film looks at him as the hero of the movie more than I did. Jeff Goldblum gets to be Jeff Goldblum but with a little more menace. What most excited me about the cast was that Sofia Boutella gets to kick ass. She's a nice actress, but he physicality is still her greatest strength. This film uses it well. 

With a few tweaks, Hotel Artemis would be a movie I love. It has all the right pieces - a great cast, an interesting setting, and a story structure that I'm fond of. However, I can't tell if the movie is too serious or if the jokes just don't land often enough. This movie is aware that it's over-the-top the same way that something like Smokin' Aces does. I expected more of it to be cut with jokes. There are some jokes. Not enough, in my opinion. And, as I mentioned before, all the stories align just a little too well. How many times in a row can a coin land on heads before it needs to be addressed? In a movie, characters are still allowed to point out when something unlikely happens. Overall though, it's a nice movie if you are in  the mood for a specific kind of action movie.

Verdict (?): Weakly Recommend