DVR Purge: 2/2-2/3

So, I went on vacation for a week without cable access. Beyond being a harrowing experience in self-deprivation, I got way behind on my TV. Of course, it was a surprisingly busy week and my DVR fucked up more than a couple times, so I'll be slowly catching up and posting these. First up, the post Superbowl shows and a Monday night with a How I Met Your Mother that needs dissection.

Past Purges

New Girl "Prince"
Seemed appropriate for an After Superbowl episode. Prince was a big get and they used his quirkiness is a funny way without it feeling like they were working around them to make the episode work. The stunt casting gave the episode that gravitas it needed. The "I love you" confession gave it importance, although am I the only one who got the sense they wrote this to fit anywhere in the season in case the schedule got messed up? I caught that Ford Fusion ad they tried to sneak in. It was funny though, so no complaints there.
Best joke: Fire and Ice = Warm Water

Brooklyn Nine Nine "Operation: Broken Feather"
This had much less of the feel of a special Post Post Superbowl episode. I'm fine with that. They threw in the football segment at the beginning (side note: Terry Crews is a frightening specimen) and otherwise went about a normal episode which did a good job highlighting what every character does well. I've accepted this Peralta/Santiago business, so as long as I like both characters individually, I can accept their inevitable (unless they throw a curve ball in there) coupling. Capt. Holt was excellent in the episode. From the Icarus story to him watching Moneyball, everything Andre Braugher did was great.

How I Met Your Mother "Sunrise"
I've been tossing and turning on this one for a while. I had to rewatch it even. My first instinct was that I didn't like it. After all, no Mother. I've made my opinion known about the three things each episode needs this season (Mother, call-backs, emotions). The more I've considered it, we can exchange Mother this week for another thing I once loved about the show: structure. Let's break it down.
Emotion: The ending of each of the three stories were genuine in this regard. Ted finally lets go of Robin (despite having an awful definition for what love is). Given that there's no taking back all the stupid stuff happening before this with Ted, this was probably the best resolution they had available. Marshall and Lily got a cop-out of a resolution to a long-brewing argument. Again, the thought behind it though, there's no winning and losing in a good relationship, leaves them in a good place and frees us of having to see them at odds for the rest of the season. Barney's is the most ridiculous story. Yet, it was a good summation of him as a character and plausibly explained his reason for being willing to change.
Call Backs: This was heavy in them, thankfully. Ted talks to loves of the past. There's a sense that Abby Elliot was available and Jennifer Morrison wasn't, which is why Jeanette got so much to do. Very little of this was funny. It recognized the history of Ted's dating head on in a good way. Marshall has an argument with 2006 Lily. He is literally fighting with a callback. San Francisco is addressed in ways it hadn't before and Marshall's dad even finds a way to sneak in. Barney and his two new proteges is essentially a summary of every conversation with Ted he's ever had. It completely covers everything the old Barney was.
Structure: By that, I mean, "was it all a dream?". The short answer is "no". The fact that Robin now knows about Ted moving to Chicago proves that. Some of this really happened. Let's think about it though. Marshall is in bed, talking to imaginary people. Clearly, we aren't supposed to think this is real. It's not a leap to call this a dream. Barney is in a drunken stupor and teaches complete strangers everything he knows in a strip club that appears out of nowhere. This is about as symbolic as you can get. Short of the two guys showing up at the wedding, scamming on the Mother, I'm fine believing Barney is passed out in a ditch, imagining all this. Finally, Ted and Robin. It's interesting that we go from Ted alone last week to with Robin now. It's good that he got help, but why her? It's a bit convenient, and I don't mean that in a bad writing sense. They are alone the entire time, doing a bad job looking for Barney, and happen to discuss exactly what Ted needs to at that moment. Oh, and let's not forget, the refrain of the song when Robin is floating away is "dreaming".
Now that I've thought it through, this is an impressively done episode. Even if I am completely misreading it, the end result is that all of our characters' struggles are wiped clean in one fell swoop. Ted is open to loving someone other than Robin. Robin is set to marry Barney. Barney has passed on the Playbook and [most of] his old ways. Marshall and Lily are staying in New York and a happy couple again. Ladies and gentlemen, it's looking like we are in the How I Met Your Mother Victory lap.*

*I hereby reserve the write to take back this claim if the writers revert back to their old ways in the coming weeks since that's what they do best.

Archer "Archer Vice: House Call"
After that HIMYM dicertation, I don't have a lot left in me. This was a small and funny episode. Taking place entirely inside Cheryl's manor, it's like an animated bottle episode. I feel bad that I never have more to say about this incredibly smartly written show. I mean, all those jokes about metric conversion. Who does that? It was great.

Delayed Reaction: Hick

The Pitch: Like Houndog without the rape. Ok, less rape.

What Took Me So Long: White trash makes me sad.

Why I Saw It: As much as I like Chloe Grace-Moretz, I can't think of anything I've seen with her as the perspective of the movie. She's been a lead, not the central character. That's not a commentary on this movie so much as an observation. A commentary would be if I said it's a shame this was the first time I saw her carry a movie, but I'll get to that. This has an odd and eclectic cast. It's one of those movies that I can't decide whether it is exaggerated madness or subtle effectiveness. I certainly wasn't intrigued enough to determine which. I know that I came away from this wondering if the whole thing was a story she imagined, that never really happened. Am I reading into it too much or did other people share this thought?

Why I Wish I Hadn't: I'm leaning toward thinking it was exaggerated madness. Blake Lively and Eddie Redmayne do not pull off subtle rednecks. Mostly, I think I just don't approve of Alec Baldwin and Chloe Moretz working together after playing such great enemies is 30 Rock.

Verdict (?): Weakly Don't Recommend

Delayed Reaction: Midnight Cowboy

The Pitch: A wannabe gigolo and his gimp buddy try to survive in New York.

What Took Me So Long: I'm not a huge Jon Voight fan and I always forget it has Dustin Hoffman.

Why I Saw It: There's this group of classic movies (most from the "New Hollywood" era) that, as much as I want to, I don't get. That's how I feel about The Graduate. It's how I feel about One Flew Over the Cukoo's Nest. More than any, it's how I feel about this. I'd love if someone could explain what is so great about this. I want to understand. It's an interesting look at New York in the late 60s and Joe's flashbacks are a nice touch. The acting is fine. The story is, let's call it free-form, which has a charm but I don't see where it was trying to go. Most of all, I'm not sure that I cared about Joe and Rizzo's friendship anywhere near as much as I was supposed to by the end.

Why I Wish I Hadn't: No matter what I think, it is a classic, so there's value in seeing it. There's certainly a list of classics I'd rather have gotten to first though.

Verdict (?): Weakly Recommend

Movie Reaction: The Lego Movie

Formula: Toy Story / (Any toy that isn't Legos)

Note: I don't know if the plural of Lego is. Does it need the 'e' before the 's' or not? I'm going with my gut though.

Why I Saw It: Great voice cast, directors I'm growing to like, unique animation, etc.

[Voice] Cast: Chris Pratt, Elizabeth Banks, Will Arnett, Alison Brie, Charlie Day, Will Ferrell, Will Forte, Morgan Freeman, Jonah Hill, Channing Tatum, Jake Johnson, Liam Neeson, Shaq, Nick Offerman, Cobie Smulders, Billy Dee Williams. Need I say more?
...oh, I do. Uh, ok. Pratt, as seen from his work as Andy on Parks and Rec. can turn on overgrown-child mode which suits animation and this in particular very well.He's the only one who has to do much with his character. The rest is stunt-casting, mostly resulting in a couple good moments for each.

Plot: The story starts off as a sort of dystopia. Pratt's Emmet finds himself on a quest to stop Ferrell's President Business from destroying the world. That alone is fine for a kids movie. I'd've watched that enjoyably for the whole 90 minutes. Without going too much into a couple turns the movie throws in, there's a bigger message in this that I loved about creativity and imagination, which is perfect for what Legos have always stood for. It's a great message for kids and, as an adult who has always had trouble letting go of the childish freedom to create, I ate it up as well. The plot does over-reach though. It goes on a big "everybody's special" kick which I was not as hot on. Perhaps changing it to "everyone is different" or "everyone has their strengths" would've hit me better than "everyone is a winner and can be absolutely anything ever and should". Sorry for being vague about some of the specifics. There's just a couple things in here I'd rather not ruin.

Animation: This was a cool animation technique. The giant Lego world allowed this to look different than any other animated movie I've seen. It isn't as seamless as some of the best that Pixar or Dreamworks has to offer but it is so drenched on nostalgia that it didn't matter.

Elephant in the Room: How much does it rely on "Look, it's animated Legos!!!"? I don't walk into any animated movie rated under PG-13 expecting to constantly laugh. There's a give an take to most of them (one for the kids, one for the adults). The kid jokes are easy and I didn't find them to be groan-worthy here. For adults, the movie had to be clever. Sometimes, it tried to be too clever, but mostly, I enjoyed it. There is a lot of playing with the history of Legos and the backlist of generations the company has (generic city, outer space, wild west, pirates, NBA, etc.).

To Sum Things Up:
I went into The Lego Movie with high expectations but little idea of how it would be executed. Thankfully, the writers and producers put more thought into that than I did. If all you need is a hundred callbacks to memories of playing with Legos, you'll leave pleased. I would call the jokes in in charming as opposed to laugh out loud. What sold it for me is that the story is aiming a little higher than callbacks and jokes and succeeds, albeit with much subtlety.

Verdict (?): Strongly Recommend

Delayed Reaction: Tango & Cash

The Pitch: Kurt Rusell, Sylvester Stallone. Buddy Cops.

What Took Me So Long: I always confuse it with Turner and Hootch which isn't encouraging.

Why I Saw It: (Club 50) Here I thought I'd seen a lot of buddy cop movies. As I've discovered over the last year or so, I've barely scratched the surface. I think both Tango and Cash are introduced effectively. The movie does a great job of handling their dual type-A partnership. The falsely accused angle is interestingly handled since normally they normally don't even make it to jail in this type of movie. Russell and Stallone are both allowed to play in their comfort zones which allows them to form an easy chemistry.

Why I Wish I Hadn't: As I've said. This sub-genre is a saturated landscape. This hardly stopped me from thinking "if you've seen one, you've seen them all." I'm sure everything is there for big fans on buddy-cop movies. At best, I'm a casual enjoyer of them, so it doesn't strike me as anything special.

Verdict (?): Weakly Recommend

Delayed Reaction: The Shadow

The Pitch: Something about Alec Baldwin playing a Jedi Batman.

What Took Me So Long: Alec Baldwin in a leading role has never been a draw for me.

Why I Saw It: (Club 50) Few reasons come to mind. This is one hell of a relic of a superhero movie (if you want to call it that). I can't think of a movie that it's even similar to. Maybe The Spirit but with less style.

Why I Wish I Hadn't: From the first moment to the end I had no idea what was going on. Apparently, Alec Baldwin pulls a Last Samurai and is some sort of Asian warlord and he has (gets) telekinetic powers. So, he gets he ass handed to him, then becomes a hero when he goes back to New York. Given his mind control powers, I don't know why he bothers concealing his identity. Anyways, it figures the woman he falls in love with can also read minds. I don't think they ever explained why she could, or maybe I didn't care enough to remember. Well, Baldwin ends up fighting some Mongolian descendant of Gengis Khan because, I'm guessing this was one of the three things whoever came up with the story knew about Asia, which made it seem fitting. Baldwin wins despite Tim Curry getting in the way. Baldwin and the mom from Kindergarten Cop live happily ever after...I think. This was such a mess. How much of this did the producers think people would already know about? Is The Shadow one of those characters that everyone knows about, like Superman, so they can wink at the camera all they want? Or is it more like Tintin: super popular somewhere that isn't where I am? I guessing it's more along the lines of the Lone Ranger (bad company to keep these days): a character people much older than I know who has fallen out of the cultural consciousness. Whatever it is, it translated into a bad movie.

Verdict (?): Strongly Don't Recommend

Delayed Reaction: Compliance

The Pitch: A story of a phone prank that goes too far. Based on a true story.

What Took Me So Long: It wasn't a movie I wanted to see in theaters so I waited for it on Netflix.

Why I Saw It: This is based on actual events that I'd read about a while before I knew there was a movie. The only thing that makes this movie work is that it's based on something that really happened. It's exaggerated, but not as much as you'd expect. It says a ton about people's tendency to comply to authority, to a pretty disturbing degree really. Ann Dowd manages to play her character believably which is quite a feat. Dreama Walker proves to have more range than I suspected based only on what I'd seen in Don't Trust the B... in Apt. 23.

Why I Wish I Hadn't: I hate whenever a movie makes me feel guilty about someone getting naked in it, so that's a petty gripe, because Dreama Walker totally does and it's super uncomfortable. I'd say my only legitimate complaint is with how far beyond the actual events it goes. Everything up to naked jumping jacks, somehow, is true. I get the need to take it a step further since this is a movie and it helps to solidify the horror of it. At the same time, I think it pushes the concept past the point of reason. It is hard to believe that any of this happened, so anything that didn't actually take place naturally comes off as implausible.

Verdict (?): Weakly Recommend

Delayed Reaction: Save the Date

The Pitch: Let's get a lot of funny people for as not so funny movie about dating.

What Took Me So Long: If this was a comedy, I'd've seen it the first chance I had.

Why I Saw It: I like Lizzy Caplan, Alison Brie, Martin Starr, and the others in this cast a lot. Caplan plays a good frustrated, indecisive 20-something in New York. Brie continues to remind me that no one is giving her a lead role and that's a crime.Geoffrey Arend is rawer than I've ever seen him before and does a better job with it than I expected. Starr always looks like he isn't paying attention which is sort of his thing and I like him for that. Then there's Mark Webber who could not be playing a better clone of Ethan Embry from Can't Hardly Wait if he tried. I liked a lot of what the movie had to say about relationships and how they can fall apart over time if you aren't careful or idealize them too much.

Why I Wish I Hadn't: I am so tired of movies about people in their 20s who all have jobs as artists. I think it's Mindy Kaling who has a great rant about how many art galleries there can possibly be. I'd like it if the people in these movies had some normal, soul-sucking jobs. None of this living by myself in New York, working part time for a book store shit. It's a small thing that's starting to really bug me. This movie reeks of "indie movie" which isn't necessarily a bad thing, but it does fall into a lot of the common trappings.

Verdict (?): Weakly Don't Recommend

February Preview

I was wrong about January being lean. A four movie weekend made sure of that. I'm off to a bad start showing restraint. I'll no longer pretend that "one movie a week" is a rule or goal. I've amended it to "at least one, more if the circumstances call for it".
February is looking incredibly top-heavy. The only locks are in the first week and I've barely even heard of some of the later movies. Sadly, I'm out of Oscar pictures to fill the time  so there's a good chance I'll see Pompeii for god's sake. Well, let's see what the month brings.

2014

January 

2013

March |  April | May | June | July | August | September | October | November | December

2/7

The Lock: The Lego Movie
I saw the preview for this months ago and I am completely on board. From the directors of 21 Jump Street and Cloudy with a Chance of Meatballs (I can imagine the cross-section of those jokes for this). The voice cast is a checklist of people I want in a movie (Chris Pratt, Jonah Hill, Elizabeth Banks, Alison Brie, Cobie Smulders, Charlie Day, Will Ferrell, Nick Offerman. The list goes for miles). I've accepted the child-filled matinee I will see this in and don't care.
Odds I'll See It: 95%

The Other Lock: The Monuments Men
This was originally a Christmas release that got pushed out due to an already crowded and competitive season. I haven't heard anything about it being moved due to quality concerns. Obviously, it isn't seen as an Oscar contender given the release date but that's not to say I should assume it will be bad (It looks more like a Shutter Island kind of move from a couple years ago). Between George Clooney, Matt Damon, Bill Murray, Jean Dujardin, Cate Blanchett, and others, I lose count of the Oscars and nominations. It's looks like a less violent lighter spin on Inglourious Basterds. My only fear is that it will take itself too seriously.
Odds I'll See It: 80%

Other Options:

Vampire Academy - I'm pretty sure there's no way I'm seeing this. I think it's based on a book. It's about vampires and high school. Here's the X factor though: The writer wrote Heathers and the director directed Mean Girls. Yeah, this could be a surprise.
Odds I'll See It: 41%

2/14

The Lock:  None

Other Options:

About Last Night - Kevin Hart is doing everything he can to take advantage of his swell in popularity. I'm all for it and wish him well. This is from the writer of Bachelorette, which I liked for it's dialogue and characters but this is also a remake of a movie. That probably cancels each other out. I can wait for this on video.
Odds I'll See It: 23%

Is there ever a future where Detroit is a nice place to live?

Robocop - Look, I barely understand what made the original movie work. The people who made Dredd got lucky too. I have much lower hopes for this remake.
Odds I'll See It: 18%

Winter's Tale - The advertising for this has been everywhere weeks before its release and I couldn't tell you a thing about it. I don't think it's related to the Shakespeare play. I think Colin Farrell is traveling through time. Will Smith is apparently in it somewhere. Why are they keeping that so quiet in the previews? I should have a much better idea what this is by now. That I don't gives me great pause.
Odds I'll See It: 11%

Endless Love - They are remaking this? With whom? The Sue Snell from the Carrie remake and the new stripper from Magic Mike. That doesn't sound promising. Oof, and from the director of Country Strong. Pass!
Odds I'll See It: 2%

2/21

The Lock: None

Other Options:

The Wind Rises - Hayao Miyazaki is a filmmaker I want to get into more yet still haven't. I've seen Spirited Away and it was good. He has a long list of hits in Japan that make him the James Cameron of that place. I'd kind of like to see one of his movies in theaters and considering this is his final movie before retiring, I guess this is my last chance. I know nothing about the movie though. I believe it's a biography of some Japanese guy. Something to do with flying.
Odds I'll See It: 38%

Pompeii - You get the feeling that no one in the movie thought any further than "let's shoot a volcano eruption". I'm generally curious to see what the girl from Sucker Punch, Mr. Eko, and Trinity are up to. Not enough to give this action/romance, certain to be 3D hybrid a chance.
Odds I'll See It: 10%

This is the only image you can find for this movie

3 Days to Kill - So, this isn't Taken? Are we sure. Kevin Costner is some sort of special forces guy and he has an estranged daughter (played by Amber Heard, so that's a plus) and he gets pulled back in for an assignment that could save his life. Oh yeah, he's dying of something. Look, I know it isn't exactly like Taken, but it's generic enough not to care.
Odds I'll See It: 5%

2/28

The Lock: None again.

Other Options:

I'm sorry, but if you discover time travel, you go an win the Powerball.

Welcome to Yesterday - I like the found-footage style in general. I think it works best for horror, but I'm interested to see what else can be done with it. This time it is being used to tell the story of some teens who discover time travel. Time travel is always tough to pull off in a movie and first time directors and screenwriters are not the most reliable people in general. If it turns out this is good, I'm probably see it and eat it up.
Odds I'll See It: 27%

Non-Stop - Remember last week, when I made a joke about a movie not being Taken? This one has Liam Nesson in it, so it's an even harder clarification. The movie sounds more like a testosterone Red Eye than Taken. I can't help but notice Lupita Nyong'o in the cast list. That could be enough to get me seeing this. I'm curious if 12 Years a Slave is just a perfect role for her or if she has range.
Odds I'll See It: 10%

Son of God - Oh, lord almighty. Another one of these. I doubt we are looking at another Passion of the Christ. In fact, I'm pretty confident this'll be more along the lines of The Nativity Story. I assume this one will get high per-theater averages but hardly sets the box office ablaze. For now, I'm going to assume this won't be presenting an inventive spin on the story which gives me little reason to see the same story again.
Odds I'll See It: 1%

Celebrity Death "Do I Care?" Index: Philip Seymour Hoffman

When I first did the Celebrity Death Index, I assumed that Paul Walker was the worst case scenario for a while. I figured this would be a lot of going after old celebrities who haven't mattered to pop culture in a while. As it turns out, I didn't get many of these under my belt before I got a biggie. The news of Philip Seymour Hoffman has been quite a surprise. Regardless, it's time to go to work.

Movies I Remembered Him InBoogie Nights (1997) - In such a large ensemble, he still stuck out.The Big Lebowski (1997) - A small but entertaining part. He had many of those kinds of roles.The Talented Mr. Ripley (1999) - Only saw it recently. It got better when he showed up.Almost Famous (2000) - Fantastic movie. Another case of Hoffman being brought in to punch up a role.Along Came Polly (2004) - Easily my favorite character in the movie and a casting coup by the producers.Capote (2005) - His first Oscar nomination and only win. I feel even worse about not seeing this when it was still on Netflix Instant queue. Now I'm determined to see it.Charlie Wilson's War (2008) - His second Oscar nomination. I'm starting to wonder if there was ever a better supporting actor in Hollywood. He excelled at propping up those around him.The Master (2012) - His fourth and final Oscar nomination. He was robbed of an Oscar for what may be his finest performance. While I didn't prefer the film, it was filmed with powerhouse performances.The Hunger Games: Catching Fire (2013) - It's so disappointing because he had such a small role in this movie but it was leading to a lot more in the next two movies.

Movies I Forgot He Was InTwister (1996) - I totally do not remember him in this.Magnolia (1999) - Still need to see it. Basically, every actor was in the movie, so it shouldn't surprise me that he was too.Punch Drunk Love (2002) - A very enjoyable movie and another that I completely forgot he was in.Cold Mountain (2003) - Perhaps it's for the best that I don't remember him here.Mission Impossible III (2006) - It's surprising he wasn't used as the villain in movies more often. He carried himself perfectly for it.Doubt (2008) - His third Oscar nomination. That's all I know about this.Pirate Radio (2009) - He went into slacker mode so well. This looked like a good role for him. Yet to see it.The Ides of March (2011) - He didn't have a lot to do, but another good role for him in a movie that was simply too dull to be remembered.Moneyball (2011) - No Oscar nomination for this one. It was clearly a role he had a lot of fun with.


Movies That He Was Still Working On
Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part 1 & 2 (2014 & 15) - It wasn't quite like my Dark Knight concerns with Heath Leger in 2008, but my first thought upon hearing of his death was "I hope they finished filming The Hunger Games". My understanding is that Part 1 won't be affected at all and Part 2 will only be minimally affected. In short, we'll be getting some P.S.H. for a couple more years which will make it a lot easier to digest.

Any Other Reason I Should Care
I liked Hoffman as an actor. I don't remember him in interviews or anything that gave me a sense of the man. He was a real actor and brought it to all of his roles. He didn't have a music career on the side or something like that to be deprived of. His reach in pop culture wasn't wide.

Verdict: I'm pretty upset about this, in as far as I can  be upset for anyone dying who I didn't know personally know. He was a tremendously talented actor. At 46, he promised to have many fruitful years ahead. This is a loss of great potential. While I knew he had some drug problems, I never assumed they were this bad, which may be a credit to how cool and collected he was on screen. Yeah, this death is a bummer for movie fans everywhere.