Delayed Reaction: Siren

Premise: Men on a bachelor party accidentally unleash a dangerous creature in the form of a young women.

I was never under the impression that this would be a great movie. I saw it as a curio. You see, it's based on a short from the horror anthology movie V/H/S, which I love and bring up whenever I can. The short, "Amateur Night" is one of the shorts I really liked too. When I heard someone had developed it into a feature film, I had to see how.

Siren wasn't made by the same people who made the short though. I would've liked to see the David Buckner version of this. Instead, this was made by the guy who made the short "Dante the Great" from V/H/S: Viral: my least favorite short in my least favorite V/H/S anthology.

So no, I didn't care for Siren. Say what you will about found footage, but it does a good job of masking bad acting. Siren doesn't opt to use the found footage style, and the performances suffer because of it. I don't really get the point of building a secret society and mysterious villain around this whole story idea. The scares in "Amateur Night" were a lot messier and primal. Siren was more like Frankenstein’s monster. I didn't particularly like any of the characters, so their fates didn't mean anything to me.

Something that was particularly distracting was Hannah Fierman as the Siren. I'm guessing she had a no nudity clause for this movie, which is fine, but it meant her costuming was pretty silly. They do tricks like styling her hair on the front or covering her chest in blood which really only called more attention to the fact that they were trying to not show her naked. If that was the case, just give her a costume. It's fine. No one should be watching this for titillation anyway.

Verdict: Strongly Don't Recommend