There's an interesting evolution that seems to happen when someone has a kid. They stop being one of the people who hates parents who bring their obnoxious kids places and become one of them.
People with kids, I get it. They don't care. If their kid is yelling at O'Charley's, so what? This is their first meal that didn't include Mac n' Cheese or apple slices in months. Frankly, these parent can 'not care' all they want. But, don't give me shit when I scoff and say "someone should get that kid a muzzle" obviously within earshot. Part of not giving a shit that your kid bothers other people is actually not giving a shit. You can either grin and bear it or take it out on the kid later (that's up to you). The kid is the one making this an issue, not me. Besides, if you kick my ass, you have the cops at your doorstep the next day (that's a promise), but if you can smack the kid around later and threaten their Barbie if they tell anyone, while I don't approve, it's your kid. I don't care, in all honesty.
If you make the mistake of bringing the kid to a movie, then responsibility does not disappear with the lights. Get that noisy piece of shit out of the theater if they are going to talk through the Green Lantern's oath* and catch the part you miss on DVD one night after you spike the kid's ice cream with Nyquil. I don't care how you do it, but I'm not putting down 10 bucks to have the best part ruined by Mikey yelling that he's scared. Why is this kid seeing Saw with you anyway? You are a bad parent.
*Yeah, I wrote this a while ago. I'm not in the mood to update it.
Alternately, people without kids, stop being dicks. I get that you didn't sign up for kids, but I didn't sign up for hobos and still have to put up with them when I leave the house. Kids are a consequence you should expect. Example: The book store has a kid's section, so I'm sorry that you don't get to read that book in the store [that you have no intention of buying anyways] in quiet solitude.
There's also no need to scoff at the mere sight of a mom with two five year-olds and a baby walking into a coffee shop. Until one of them yells in your ear or wipes the unknown stickiness on his hand on your table, they aren't bothering you. Parents are people too, only with a small, unruly army.
You don't have to follow the golden rule here. Just maintain you righteous indignation for the second they make the first misstep. Never cede the high ground. In polite society it is your greatest weapon.
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